1- Two great players, both good friends of mine from England, Robert Sheehan and Jonathan Cansino, have a terrible game. Of course each thinks it is the other’s fault. Finally Sheehan hands Jonathan a tiny piece of blank paper and says: Here Jonathan, write down everything you know about bridge.» Johnthan replies: «Well, it’s a bigger piece of paper than I would have given you.»

2- Playing with Marshall Miles, I leave the table for a moment after Marshall doubled a 1D opening bid and jumped to 2NT over my heart response which I raised to 3NT having a pretty good hand including the J10x of diamonds. When I return, Marshall is down two. I ask Marshall what happened. He says he misguessed the DQ. I asked him if he played the opening bidder for it and he said: «No, I played you for it, and you didn’t have it!» (Marshall had two little diamonds!

3- When Oswald Jacoby was in his eighties, he bid every time it was his turn. His partners asked why. He said: «At my age the bidding may not get back around to me again.»

4- always looks in both opponents’ hands before the bidding starts. As a result he never misguesses the location of any missing honors. One day sitting South he is angling towards a small slam in spades. West has Kx of spades and wants Too Tall to bid a grand so he hides his small spade in with his clubs and let’s Too Tall see the singleton king. Too Tall promptly bids a grand, wins the opening lead, and bangs down the ace of spades. When the king doesn’t fall, he gets up and quits the game saying, «I don’t want to play in a game with cheaters.»