Bridge & Humor: Proving his point

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Source: 69th Summer North American Bridge Championships • July 24-August 3, 1997 • Albuquerque, New Mexico

Ron Andersen
Ron Andersen

Years ago, David Berkowitz and Ron Andersen were partners in the Life Master Pairs. They were cruising along with a pretty good game in the first session when Andersen picked up this hand as dealer:

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Deciding to be sneaky, Andersen passed. The next player passed, as did Berkowitz, holding:

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The player in fourth seat considered his hand, thought things over briefly — and passed.

The post mortem began.

“I had 11,” said one of the opponents.

“I had 10,” said the other.

They looked at Berkowitz. “I had eight,” he said.

“So,” said one of the opponents to Andersen, “you had 11.”

“I had 10,” said the man who came to be known as The Hog.

“You couldn’t have,” the opponents said.

“I had 10,” insisted The Hog.

“You can’t even count your points,” one of the opponents chided.

“Okay,” said Andersen with a glare as he turned his hearts face up on the table one by one. “One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, TEN!”

Andersen and Berkowitz, frigid for 13 tricks in hearts, had conspired to pass out the deal.

The one positive aspect of the comedy is that Berkowitz and Andersen made a bet with another player that, without going minus on a board, they had earned themselves an absolute zero on the board. They were right — they were the only pair of the 300 or so who played the deal who failed to get a plus.