Bridge & Humor: Gratz Scott’s Stories by Ely Culbertson

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Reading Eagle – 16 Sep 1935

The death of Gratz M. Scott in New York has removed from the list of bridge leaders a name which was prominent in the venerable game of whist and in its successors, auction and contract bridge. One of the most popular of the expert players and teachers, Gratz was one of the few real gentlemen that we can boast of in the bridge profession.

It is possible that Gratz Scott’s untimely death was hastened by the following harrowing experience:

He was playing for pretty high stakes with a millionaire as a partner who fancied himself rather hot as a bridge player, but who actually was a beginner. Holding spades A-K-Q-2, hearts A-K-Q, diamonds A-K-Q. clubs A-K-Q, the self-styled expert found himself playing a grand slam in spades. The dummy held four spades to the jack. A club was opened, and the beginner first took his three high clubs. Then he led out his top hearts, then his top diamonds. Now, having nothing left but the four high trumps, he proudly led them: out, starting with the ace.

By a miracle, every player had three cards of each suit, and no one could trump his hearts, diamonds or clubs, so he won every trick. Meanwhile, poor Gratz was suffering tortures of hell every time a card was led. Swelling with pride, the millionaire turned to Gratz:

«Well, that was perfect, eh, Gratz?»

«Perfect, you miserable fish!» Gratz exclaimed, on the verge of collapse.

«You had 13 cards to play and not’ one of them did you play correctly.»