No Cell Phones
Judy, Trudy and Meg wanted to play in the Mixed Pairs, so they went to the Director beforehand. He greeted them warmly but warns, “We have one rule here: No mobile phones!”
Sure enough, before another word could be spoken, Judy’s phone rings, and the Director says, “Sorry, Judy. For that I must pair you with Joe, the worst male bridge player of all time.”
A few minutes later Trudy’s phone chimes, and the Director says, “Too bad, Trudy. Your partner will be Sam, who is about as hopeless as they come.”
Meanwhile, Meg waits patiently for almost an hour with her phone carefully turned off. Finally, the Director walks over with Zia Mahmoud and says, “Congratulations, Meg! Your partner is the world’s best player.”
Meg is awestruck as she turns to Zia, “I can’t believe it! What could I have done to deserve a partner as great as you?”
“I don’t know what happened to you,” grumbled Zia, “but my damn phone went off!”
You can usually tell when Friar Andrew has had a good result because his normal smiling face beams even larger. The other day when I arrived at his table he was grinning from ear to ear.
“We got a complete top – nobody else was even in a small slam let alone the grand”. After congratulating him, he went on “of course, we had to have a couple of bidding misunderstandings to get there”!!
A story by Alvin Roth
Post in rec.games.bridge on 12-Feb-2003 by Andrew Gumperz ‘…It is a hoary old rubber bridge tactic to pass holding a long solid suit.
Playing rubber bridge, Bobby Nail was dealt: x, x, x, AKQJxxxxxx. LHO passed. Bobby passed. The auction continued pass-pass.
Stone-faced, Bobby threw in his cards.
As the next hand was being dealt, his LOL partner said, «What did you have on that hand Bobby? All I had were three bare aces…